SCORECARD

Kalamity in Kalaverley

Claverley 209 all out
Fitmen 53 all out
Claverley won by 153 runs


Less world class performance a la Commonwealth Games and more a preview of The Edinburgh Fringe as the Fitmen went on their hols to rural Shropshire.

A brave 8 found the ground and that really was the highlight of the performance. The octet had thoughts of emulating the last visit in 2012 http://www.fitmen.org.uk/reports/430 when the headline read “Magnificent 7 (+ 1) Fall In Final Over Tragedy”. Sadly the only similarity was the number of players we put out!

A lost toss saw the home side elect to bat on a hot and sunny day (8th in a row?). 'Heads in Shropshire' was a Tom Brown schoolboy error by skipper Rich, but he was to turn into Flashman later in the innings.

It actually started pretty well with the Toni (8-2-24-1) & Guy (8-1-26-1) show being as mean as usual. The first 10 overs yielded only 35 and a wicket down. In fact the bowling and fielding generally was OK. Admittedly Claverley were generous enough to lend a couple of fielders (including a home sledger), but 4 catches taken gave a reasonable summary of the hard work on a hot afternoon.


Sharrif’s return of 8-0-32-2 was also a good indication of a job well done and included the wicket of the host’s top scorer. Taz thought he’d returned to test cricket when he ended up with 3 spells in his 8-1-48-1 due to an administrative error (bowler and skipper being unable to accurately count to 8). But the star of the bowling attack had to be Umberto.

Having informed Jonesy he was now considered a word class opening bat, Skipper put himself on and achieved his best return of the season with 11-0-61-4 (downgraded to 8 overs once the extras were removed).

Being barred from pitching the ball against anyone under 4 feet tall, Umberto resorted to beaming out the two plucky 12 year olds who had earlier kindly fielded for us. With this there came a possibility of restricting the hosts to around 160 looked likely.
However the last 4 or 5 overs were put to all parts of the ground and an over generous 209 was yielded and Umberto was denied his ‘Five For’ as the fielders congratulated Tuckerrrrr on his 2nd performance this season to avoid Umberto getting a jug.


General consensus was an excellent tea, and with blood sugar levels returning to normal, the fearless eight were under the impression that the target was do-able.

We even had the gift of an extra batsman from Claverley, but only if he could leave at 5:15 to visit his elderly mother (97 in case anyone was wondering). So he opened with Tom who successfully kept the strike from him until 5:14.
First wicket fell at 5:15 right on cue and whilst this was all part of the plan, the next hour or so wasn’t!

Next out was Chris having looked good for his 0, followed by Tom for 13. But no panic as their v tall quickie would be off soon. Tuckkerrrr certainly didn’t panic as he strolled a single (he’d actually stopped forward momentum when they whipped the bails off) and was run out by a chain.

Sharrif and Taz followed in relatively quick succession, Umberto decided to perfect his reverse sweep with encouragement from the slip cordon. After missing the first attempt he connected with the second and looped to slip……………..we’re hoping for 3rd time lucky next week.

The Toni & Guy show kicked off a (very) mini revival with Guy’s swishing 9 before becoming young Joe’s first ever wicket against grown-ups. A quick straw poll by the fielders voted Tuckkerrrr and Jonesy as the two batsmen they’d most like to see again and in they came for a second go. Both were marginal improvements as Mark knocked a couple of boundaries before falling.

Last wicket partnership between Jonesy and Chairman looked unflustered for a ball or two. Desperate to get off a ‘pair’ Jonesy called one to deep gully and that was the end of that since the Chairman was still in conversation with the umpire when the bails disappeared.

All in all, it may have been a ‘modern day record’ for the Old Mo……..we’ll check and see if there have been any more abject batting displays in the last 10 years. Unlikely.