SCORECARD

Damp squid ends as a firecracker

Old Moseley Arms Fitmen 172-8 (30 overs)
Coftonians 87 all out
Fitmen win by 85 runs

So the wettest season in living memory ended with a convincing win for the Fitmen.

The tense build up (C’mon Shefali – give us a dry day) to the final Sunday of the season was kept keener with the knowledge that Neal had cornered the local mutton market. In the event of a monsoon he would be desperately trying to revive Dolly and convince her to stay fresh for the Christmas dinner.

But Lady Luck shone on the righteous, they ran it up the flag pole and everyone saluted. Bravo!

There was menace in the air however and reports of rain forecast for various times between 4pm, 6pm and 8pm led to an agreement of 30 overs a side……………I say ‘a side’ but our long time sparring partners Coftonians had experienced a bout of unavailability…………..strangely all those who happened to support either India or Pakistan who happened to be facing each other in a crucial winner takes all clash in Sri Lanka’s T/20 World Cup.

But, stiffened by Fitmen the toss losers took to the field and faced down MilliBice and Turg Jnr. A slow start and after 5 overs it appeared the once domineering mid-week opening specialist had caught the Turg disease. With Capt Turg itching to enter the fray at 3, Bice was suddenly spurred into action at the sight of Tucker being tossed the ball as a guest ‘bowler’.

How did he convince Capt Surplice of that one!

3 overs later and 40 runs to the good (from Bice’s viewpoint) he took a blow and saved his strength for the tough winter nets ahead (start Wed 9th January – 8pm to 9pm at Edgbaston). One of the Bicemeister's sixes off the unfortunate Tuckerrrrr not only endangered golfers in the light rough, but plugged into the middle of the bunker (*see 'Bice's Bunker' link at foot) - would have had Tony Grieg burbling with delight in those clipped dulcet tones “Oif niver expirrienced addythink as big biffer”

The hare was running though and Bice (67) and Caesar Minor (32) promptly set the platform for a big score. Howarth’s appearance at 3 was brief but frisky (10 off 15) before the rich heritage of the Fitmen kicked in and a clatter of wickets saw 5 go back to the changing room in less than 5 overs.

Verte was rouged by Chairman at gully for a golden, Butch joined him two balls later and it had all the hallmarks of a ‘classic’ as Chiz entered the fray, fumbled for 8 balls and it all looked a bit tom and dick (rhyming slang– not the FitOpeners).

Cometh the hour, cometh the heavyweights as Martin (29 not out at a run a ball – but can’t play the leg side Yorker) and Chas (11) steadied the list. Chas eventually fell allowing the impressive Jowett to knock up an undefeated run a ball 2.

The Dupiaza drifting in from the culinary corner meant only one thing – get the tea completed as there’s a second meal due in 2 hours. Mother Sedhova’s Parkoras were ‘standard’ (ie bleddy brilliant), a truck load of Aldi cakes (ave cost 4p per cake) were supplemented by Cocktail Wieners from the same emporium (ave price 0.2p each) and 12 sandwiches per person – just the appetiser chaps!

The bus final was off, so the visitors made an impressive start in their reply. Trolling along at 5 an over perhaps this wasn’t a foregone conclusion as Jowett toiled up the hill and Chas was kept busy at long stop when taking a well-earned break from the efforts of his Sharif-run-up performance at the other end (5.5-0-18-2).

‘Call for Butch’ the cry went out……………..fresh from not troubling the scorers in his specialist subject, the wily left hander (6-1-22-2) mixed floaters with squirters and had ‘em all ends up and suddenly it was a different game.

The big fella (4-1-9-2) joined in the fun grunting up the hill in a bid to take 6 and overtake the Nutter in the season stats. …no sooner had he made a dent when the indehiscent fruit himself nipped in for yet another one (2-0-7-1) stretching his season total to 22.

A convivial end to a frustrating but enjoyable season. Highs and lows in the season report coming soon!
The Firecracker kicked in at The Clarences circa 2am.

How Big Was that?
Bice’s Bunker
*No – not the bunker nearest to the cricket ground – the one protecting the green!
PS
Big Big thanks to ‘The Ashfield Crew’ for yet another lesson in hospitality this season- and to top it all a culinary delight post match featuring Sheep, Fowl and various rude shaped vegetables. Lovely job.