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Fixtures and Results | Match Reports

Date Against H/A Link Result Captain/Score
Sun 19 / 4 / 2015 Coombs Wood Away Lost by 9 wickets. Old Mo 171 Oppo 174-1.


Whipped on the Highveld............
Fitmen 171 all out
Coombes Wood 176-1

Coombes Wood win by 9 wickets

In contrast to the Tom Foolery at the top of the England order, The Fitmen have (so far) looked pretty sound to start off with. It’s the rest that cause the problem. There was a notable exception this weekend when the Old Mo equivalent to Joe Root* (Northern, lippy, future England Captain and disliked by opposition batsmen) carried the innings with a fluent 65.
*Only three of these facts are .....well, facts.

This was the Fitmen’s first visit to the ‘all new’ Coombes Wood – and what a magnificent facility it is. Views over Haden’s Hill (local knowledge from Chas), a precipice of ‘Italian Job’ proportions, 6 real ales plus two draft ciders and a capacity crowd (bizarrely watching the footy inside the well-appointed clubhouse as opposed to populating ‘The Mound’) for this pre-season form-finding friendly.
It was re-assuring to find out some things don’t change though.............

The game started on a sombre note with a minute’s silence for the second week running – and brings the Skipperrr to a record equalling total of 4 minutes without talking in April.

The mood soon lifted with a ‘Heads in Halesowen’ correctly called (who’s going to be the first skipper to call wrong?) and the pleasure of a bat first. Back to the bar and off we go.

A cracking wicket promised much as the minor re-modelling of the opening pair saw Turg Snr replaced by AN Other Turg who joined up with Turg Jnr. A decent opening pair for the hosts kept them honest...........too honest in Rob’s case (2 @ 17) as the opener found his length with a Yorker. Commeth the hour commeth the MilliBice.....hell yes.

Strike rate went up and Turg Junior (4@40) figured there were runs to be had to the short offside boundary. It might have even gone for a maximum before a stunning gully catch that brought tears to the eyes of your correspondent.

Still – with BiceMeister weighing in (30@ 88) and joined by ‘on a pair’ Chas (clearly relieved to be back in a side with matching body mass indexes) the early damage could be repaired. Didn’t see how Chas (17@106) was out.....nor Bice....but the T*atcher’s was refreshing.
The score had ticked along with some promising form from the No 3 then Sharif (8@32) came out of the greenhouse and gurned for a while before being ambled out. Enter the second of the BromsgroveGate Trio looking to avoid a pair............Raj was unlucky to miss his ninth ball by a foot or so making way for Skipperrrrrrr.

Masterful innings from the Cumbrian raconteur as he stroked 65 at a run a ball to get the visitors score towards respectability. Sunny joined in the fun with a cameo 20 @ 77 and 200 looked back on.
However..............after Sunny, Chris decided to join the ‘On a pair club’ to keep Ade company next weekend – and the first (but not the last) golden of the season.

Enter the last pair who strangely looked quite comfortable in their first knock of the year. Wearing Nutter’s close fitting strides for the second week in a row, the Chairman (7@46) got the second biggest cheer of the day (biggest was Stevie G butchering a free kick at Wembley) as the reliable Chinese cut took him off the mark. The partnership with Ash (7@70) for a while looked like it might get us close to 200. But in reality it would only last as long as quick singles were ignored...the old fella was pretty soon waddled out for 7.

171..............which appeared not really enough at the time, but as the story played out, another 100 probably wouldn’t have been enough.
Bostin’ tea and the competition to get the most on a small paper plate was shared by the Smethwick Twins who both needed to stock up on carbs for the assault ahead.

A capacity crowd were still refusing to change allegiance from Villa on TV and watch the masterclass about to unfold.

Sunny (5-1-25-0) & Ash (4.1-0-28-0) soon realised they were bowling on a belting batting track but kept it tight. Pick of the bowlers (mainly due to being the only one to get a wicket) was Chas (2-1-25-1) and the only two out of seven used not to get spanked for at least one maximum were Sharif (2-0-13-0) & Chris (2 and half-0-30-0).

It soon became apparent that all the 10 other batsmen needed to do was keep the Saffa company as he exploited the Highveld conditions to help shake off his jet lag.

The only chink of light was when Jaques lifted his foot for a nanosecond on 58– not spotted by the square leg umpire. The appeal was ignored and when the keeperrrr was given only lukewarm support from gully (whose focus had been Tatchered) it was just a question of how long the agony would last. The answer was not very long.

The Chairman’s ‘spell’ is getting shorter and he was retained for just the one over this week in order to save the arm for future events.............said the skipperrrrr.

The mound was peppered and the game concluded in 20 fairly brutal overs. Confusion (and panic) post match when a rumour that Jaques might be turning out against us for Woodhall in a couple of weeks. No-one is entirely sure.............but Raj’s captaincy skills may be put to the test on 17th May when trying to find willing bowlers.................Frosty??

PS Oi, where’s mi fags?
PPS at least we weren't playing Nantwich http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/0/cricket/32378530